working visitation…

and there were two people standing in front of our sample photo collage board (nowhere NEAR the casket…or even the visitation parlor) for ten minutes trying to figure out who everyone was. I just watched.

our viewing room is “back and to the left” after you walk in and I can’t tell you how many variations of “back and to the left” I’ve come up with over the years to direct people and avoid saying “back and to the left”

I'm interested in mortuary science. But I've heard that the pay isn't good at all. From people i have talked to in the business, you make more by owning your own funeral home. Is this really true? From that salary, can you provide for yourself?
Anonymous

like any job, the pay is going to depend on how skilled you are, your location, and the demand for your job. owning your own funeral home can either be very helpful or hurtful depending on location and market saturation.

so all that being said, all i can really say is that it’s very possible to provide for yourself. do what you want to do. if you’re looking for a job to get rich, this definitely isn’t it. and if you’re looking for an easy job to make a living, this isn’t it either.

for instance, currently, i’m making a lot more than most apprentices make, but i’m also doing a ton more than a lot of apprentices do—i’m responsible for managing our west side facility and keep things running there on a day-to-day basis, along with a lot of other things that a lot of people at this point in my career aren’t doing. and that’s because i’m good at what i do. so as your skill sets increase, you’re going to be more sought-after in the industry, and your pay will increase as your responsibilities increase.

if i came in wearing what you have on (black suit/black tie) my boss would kill me. "you look like a fuckin' mormon, kid!" Haha it sucks, but he only lets us wear blue suits and colorful ties.

haha, the suit is navy blue, and the shirt is blue as well. the tie is black and dark grey striped i think…not sure what tie i was wearing in that photo. it’s all darkened. your boss sounds like he has a stick up his ass.

also “graceful swan” and “nicki” which is actually the color of nicki minaj

also “graceful swan” and “nicki” which is actually the color of nicki minaj

probably. some other good ones not pictured are “egyptian,” “ruddy rose,” “fairest tone,” and “old age”

probably. some other good ones not pictured are “egyptian,” “ruddy rose,” “fairest tone,” and “old age”

if you’ve followed me for a long time, you know I have a fetish for mortuary cots. this is, quite simply, the best mortuary cot ever produced. I have a genuine love affair with this cot.

if you’ve followed me for a long time, you know I have a fetish for mortuary cots. this is, quite simply, the best mortuary cot ever produced. I have a genuine love affair with this cot.

yap

yap

catalog shopping for funeral supplies. lol I’ll take one “Oriental Yellow” please.

catalog shopping for funeral supplies. lol I’ll take one “Oriental Yellow” please.

honestly just heard someone ask someone else at this funeral, “when did you lose an eye?”

I’ve never seen so many face tattoos.

gonna be a long night.

i am 21 and have half of a BA in english. i am 19k debt. i am seriously, seriously thinking of switching to a mortuary science program to get the licensing to embalm/do what you do. this means abandoning my english degree which i love but feel is ultimately worthless since i don't really want to teach/am disillusioned with higher education in general (esp. university programs). do you have any advice?

it depends on what state you live in. every state’s licensing requirements are different, so in some states it would be more beneficial to you (both cost-wise and less-schooling-wise) to just finish your English BA since it’s half-completed. for instance, in my state, I just had to complete a two-year apprenticeship without any additional schooling for my funeral director’s license (with my BA in English). if I want to embalm, I would have to do a lot less schooling at mortuary school than someone who doesn’t already have a degree.

however, it varies greatly from state to state, so the only advice I can give you without knowing what state you’re in is to become very familiar with your state’s requirements, then contact the guidance counselor at the mortuary science program school to find out if it would be better for you to finish your degree or switch now.

personally, I think people should try to get jobs in the industry before they waste a ton of money on mortuary school to find out that they don’t really like it. it’s more than a job; it’s a lifestyle that you have to adapt to, and even if you think you can do it in your head, you really don’t know until you’re in the field and you’re missing birthday parties and going out with your friends because you have to work. I know a ton of people who loved mortuary school, love the business and the work, but just had to get out because it didn’t suit their lifestyle.

so this dry wad of newspaper tumbled at me in the parking lot as I was getting out of my car at the funeral home and maybe I screamed like a lil lady and maybe I didn’t

so this dry wad of newspaper tumbled at me in the parking lot as I was getting out of my car at the funeral home and maybe I screamed like a lil lady and maybe I didn’t

this is why i can’t have nice things

this is why i can’t have nice things

this is an old funeral director’s joke (and probably comes up elsewhere), but here’s how stupid i am: i didn’t even read it, and i was staring at the picture forever on my dash trying to figure out what the fuck kind of vault that was for like two minutes. i even googled “round burial vault” before reading. so stupid how my mind attacks things sometimes. been a long day.